Here are 45 tips to help you avoid common mistakes, do every detail well, and leave a good impression on the other party!
1. If you are the one to choose the dating location, it is best to choose a familiar place. You may be excited and nervous on the first date. At this time, if you are in a strange place, the new environment will make it more difficult to relax or concentrate. Essentially, the best first appointment must be very relaxing and comfortable. You can wait until you are more familiar with each other to explore new things. Keyword: a place for you to relax
2. Remember two keywords when planning your first date: “short” and “extendable”. Short, because in case you don’t have topics or if he/she is actually dull, you don’t have to stay here forever. Drinking coffee for half an hour is better than eating a 6-course meal in 2 hours. But at the same time, there must be a plan for the next step. In case you two have a good chat, and you hope to talk further, you can come up with a plan to continue.
3. Don’t forget the basic social etiquette: be on time, notify in advance if you may be late; adjust the phone to vibrate (if you are really busy, please change a different time to date; try not to play with the phone by yourself); do not eat too loudly, and don’t gobble up; be nice to others (such as waiters, taxi drivers), remember to say thank you, and open the door for them. The details make you more tasteful and attractive, and also make the atmosphere more comfortable. Suitable for men and women.
4. The easiest, best, and most error-free initial date would be a coffee shop. Starbucks, Costa, or any other chain stores are easy to find and suitable for most people’s preferences. You may wait until you are more familiar with him/her before exploring new and private coffee shops. The coffee shop is relatively economical but without sacrificing taste. If you don’t speculate, you can leave after half an hour, and you can continue to the next step if you have a good chat. Avoid crowds, be sensitive to caffeine and drink slowly.
5. Go to a restaurant or bar for a date. If possible, choose a place to watch (night scene, street scene, garden, or a performance that’s not too noisy). Aspects allow you to advance, attack, retreat, and defend. You can look at the scenery when you are tired or have nothing to say. Perhaps some topics can be generated from the scenery (memories, travel experiences, an interesting place or event). Choose your seats in the restaurant as comfortable as possible, avoid areas that are too closed and narrow or crowded
6. Slightly rare but romantic and unforgettable first date ideas: picnic in the park on sunny days. It would require a little more preparation: ready-made sandwiches, red wine, and desserts can be bought in the supermarket (of course, it is more heartwarming to make them yourself); you can bring blankets or tablecloths, red wine glasses to spread on the ground. Don’t bring Chinese food; the picnic will be very uninteresting. Don’t be afraid to lose face; romantic things must be unique.
7. Slightly rare but romantic and unforgettable first date ideas: The zoo is full of childishness, and the novelty of various animals can also make two people temporarily free from the daily routine and stressful life. Make full use of the personalities of different animals to adjust the atmosphere, such as monkey mountains, hippos, and grass mud horses. There will be a lot of laughter in front of the horses. The birdhouse is suitable for quietly listening to the birds, and the butterfly house can be enjoyed by two people closely.
8. Slightly rare but romantic and unforgettable first date idea: play bowling, don’t worry about it, it’s fun to make a fool of two people together. The key is that if two people are of the same level, a little competitive atmosphere will be very helpful for the chemical reaction. Similarly, billiards and video games are also good, but it depends on whether the opponent is willing to join. From the perspective of knowing people, people in competitions are more likely to reveal their true faces.
9. Slightly rare but romantic and unforgettable first date idea: The aquarium is one of my favorite places. The marine life is beautiful, peaceful, and the strange shape creates a fun atmosphere. Aquariums are often very quiet. It is very romantic for two people to lie on the glass and look at the beautiful creatures. It is very comfortable to slow down and talk while walking. Even if it’s not the first date, it’s worth going anytime.
10. Slightly rare but romantic and unforgettable first date idea: the museum, where the quiet and focused atmosphere will make the other party work hard to suppress excitement, but at the same time pay great attention to you. Exhibits of modern art will make two people have many jokes or curious dialogues, and classical oil paintings are the best themes to appreciate together. If there are few people, standing in an empty exhibition hall may raise some chemicals!
11. Slightly rare but romantic and unforgettable first date ideas: bookstores, quiet and gorgeous bookstores make people relax and happy. You can talk about many things with both of your knowledge and preferences of books, but the premise is that you are a person who likes to read. Avoid places with noisy people.
12. Slightly rare but romantic and unforgettable first date idea: a one-hour course. Making cakes, painting, pottery, etc. For the first date, it will be natural to start this way. Both parties will pay attention to what they are doing and gradually relax after adapting to each other. What is made is also a good memory carrier. Painting, making jewelry and clay sculptures, etc.
13. Slightly rare but romantic and unforgettable first date idea: pretend to be tourists. We are often accustomed to the city we live in. If two people wear the “hats” of tourists together and rediscover the city together, they can take the city bus together, or go to the sights of the sightseeing streets like visitors. There are different discoveries. Take more photos, purely for fun!
14. Always remember to pay attention to the comfort level of your date. If you go to a too noisy place, too many people, staying too long, and being too boring, you can tell if you are enjoying it. At least you can compare with when you just arrived here and at the current moment, whether you are happier and more relaxed, or more uncomfortable and impatient? When a person becomes nervous and uncomfortable, the first thing to pay attention to is himself, instead of making the other person feel good.
15. Unless you are very confident that you can ensure a good time for the other person, please prepare alternative plans. In case the coffee shop doesn’t work, or the bar is noisier than you think, can you go to another place that won’t have the same problem? “Where do you want to go?” “I can do it…”. Two people aimlessly looking for a place on the street is not romantic. It will make each other feel distant and indecisive.
16. Remember why you are dating. The short-term goal of dating is to attract each other and bring the two people closer together, and the long-term goal is to find a partner or marriage partner. Never forget that to achieve long-term goals, you must achieve short-term goals first. Does what you are doing now Interest the other person? Does it make you look attractive? Does it make the relationship closer? Please feel free to ask yourself these questions instead of guessing whether the other person loves me or not.
17. It is not recommended to watch a movie for the first date, because the two parties may not have adapted to each other’s existence. Moreover, the lack of communication when watching movies makes it difficult to establish initial understanding and trust. If you must watch a movie, it is recommended not to watch a romantic movie because the relationship is unfamiliar, and it will be difficult to resonate with the emotions in the movie. Horror movies have a suspension bridge effect, but they are not suitable for the first date. Action movies with comedy colors are the best choice, relaxed and happy.
18. At the end of the first date, create a time of solitude. No matter what fun things you did before, at the end you two need some time to calm down, chat, and conclude. This is a good opportunity to evaluate the relationship, but please don’t confess unconvincingly at this time. No one would believe the confession of the first date.
19. If the first date is to watch a movie, don’t say goodbye directly after the movie is over. Remember the mentioned earlier? Before saying goodbye, you should have some time alone, talking about movie, sorting out your mood, and after the emotional ups and downs, everyone needs time to digest. At this time, it is good to have a cup of milk tea, have diner, or take a walk on the street together for a while. If you don’t discuss it after watching the movie, you pretty much wasted the entire date.
20. At the end of the first date, please don’t squeeze, don’t doubt if the other party enjoyed it, and whether you should go somewhere to do something. Thank him or her politely for his/her company, and say good night. If you feel good, you can plan your next date, at most, a hug. A concise and clear end is the safest and least disturbing impression.
21. Don’t know what to say? Too nervous? Worried about not looking good? Can’t guess what the other person thinks? No matter what problems you encounter when dating, please remember, when in doubt, smile. Whenever you are not sure what to do, the safest way is to smile. Although smiling will not answer your questions or solve the other’s confusion, it will make the other person think you are cute, nice, or sweet. Many times it feels irrelevant to the matter itself.
22. Pay attention to your body movements at all times, including the volume, pitch, and speed of your speech, facial expressions, body posture and orientation, the position of the limbs, whether there are too many habitual small movements. It is also recommended always to let the other person see your hands. Putting your hands in your pockets or putting them out of the other person’s line of sight may make you feel a little uneasy.
23. When dating, avoid leading the conversation and ask the other person more questions. People who keep on talking are very boring and seem full of themselves: both men and women like others’ attention. Asking questions is the best way to express attention, and they are not casual or polite questions. And please try to remember the other person’s answer, dating, sometimes like a test, test your sincerity, concentration, attention.
24. Please compliment each other appropriately. It’s not about flattering. If you’re not sure how to avoid flattering, start with the objective and apparent things: watches look great, hairstyles suit you well, and skirts look great. Compliments for people also need to be specific: the eyes are brilliant, the neck is nice, the shoulders are wide, etc. The more abstract the compliment is, the more likely it is a flatter.
25. In addition to praising each other for the first date, you can actually praise other people, including introducing the middleman you know, your mutual friends, the waiter who serves you, the taxi driver who drove for you, and the elevator door for you. Stranger. Being kind to others and positive energy are attractive qualities in anyone’s eyes. My experience: men have friendly conversations with strangers, and they have an excellent impression on women.
26. Don’t rush to reflect your unique aspects. The so-called unique, it may be that you are a little nervous, or you crazy like a certain underground band in Lithuania, or some quirks. When the two of you first met, no matter how cool or individual, it is difficult to look attractive, and most of the time it will give you a penalty. Please shut up the little monster inside and start with a normal good person.
27. OK, everyone thinks that being kind to others reflects the charm of a man. I will say a few more: get out of the elevator and help others to open the door, wait for all the ladies to go out before leaving; open all doors for your date, including the taxi door; talk to yourself, or the other person Be kind to the people and people involved, do not criticize and scold quickly; the restaurant serves food too slowly or the wrong food, do not get angry, and politely but firmly put forward your request; ladies first!!
28. Girls will do this when they are nervous in dating: each question is answered with only a few words (cold, cool, capable, but not cute and not attractive); everything is “it’s OK”, “I can do it” (Let the man take all the decisions, appear to have no opinion); always look at the mobile phone, even if there is no information or phone, or always look at the watch (makes people feel nervous, it’s better to say it directly); pretend to be well-informed about everything interesting.
29. The initial appointment should not exceed 3 hours. Generally, one and a half hours is enough for a meal. No matter how attractive you are, people will get mentally tired. When you two are delighted on the first date, that is when the excitement starts to decline. At this time, find an excuse to end the first date so that both of you are still a little bit satisfied. It will make you feel a lot of anticipation between now and the second meeting.
30. Never ask, “What do you want to do next?”. Dating is fun, but planning is not fun, so don’t let the other person do things that are not fun for you. Either give a multiple choice question or make a decision directly. Regardless of men and women, it is best to have some plans when going to the date, including if you feel good about where you might go on the second date, think ahead, and you may encounter this problem at the first date.
31. Determine your own signature drink. If you are in a bar or in a restaurant planning to drink some wine, “I’ll have a bottle of Budweiser/Ice Whiskey/Long Island Iced Tea/Mojito” is better than “What wine do you have?” People who know what they want are always better than people who are hesitant and uncertain.
32. Who pays for the initial date? Most people would say that the man pays for it. Different people have different opinions on this matter, but if a man wants to pay, try to find an opportunity to go to the bathroom and buy it directly instead of waiting for the bill to come. Paying the bill is somewhat embarrassing or awkward; let two people skip this step, absolutely smooth! Ladies must sincerely thank the man and can take the initiative to suggest that I pay for the next/next activity.
33. Don’t force the other party to conclude the first date. No matter how the other person thinks of you, this behavior is a deduction. No matter how much you like each other, or how much you need someone to accompany, or how much you want to end your single life, don’t show your desperation, thirst, or loneliness after the first date, especially men. Don’t ask silly questions like “Do you like me?”
34. If the other party forces you to conclude, please politely tell him/her: “I hope I have more time to get to know you”. If you are persecuted but don’t want to see him/her again, please don’t say this. If the first date is forcing you to explain, there is no problem at all with a straight refusal. “Thank you for your dinner/coffee/listening, you are a kind and gentle person, but I don’t have feeling for you, good luck!”
35. People often ask me if there is no phone call or text message after the first date, should I take the initiative to contact? My answer will always be: unless you clearly sense that the other party hates you, there is absolutely no problem with proactive contact! Especially for women, don’t guess why the other party doesn’t contact you, it’s meaningless! Conversely, if you don’t like the other person, don’t make it difficult to make another date.
36. How long should I contact the other party after the first date? That night or the next day, it may seem too anxious, but after the third day, the other party will start to doubt your sincerity and use various reasons to convince himself/herself that you are not so good (the teeth are a bit crooked, the face is big, the color of the clothes is too dark… ). So I suggest contacting him or her 24-48 hours after the first date, which is just right.
37. After the first date, I don’t recommend starting texting immediately. It is indeed very exciting when we first met, but it is better to release this emotion step by step rather than bursting out. If you want to get in touch immediately after you say goodbye, please thank the other party for his/her company and confirm that you have arrived home, but do not continue the conversation during the date. The feeling accumulated face-to-face and the feeling accumulated by text chat often conflict or even cancel each other.
38. Regardless of before or after the first date, I do not recommend online chat or text messages too frequently. This dramatically affects the mystery, anticipation, and chemical between the two. What is a chemical? The suffocation of them wanting to look at each other, wanting to speak and stopping, and the urge to wish not to dare to see is all chemical. The feeling in the text chat is based on fantasy, and it is easy to be disillusioned when you meet a real person
39. Must brings to the first date: 1. Chapstick (not to say that you must kiss for the first appointment, but it is uncomfortable even if you look at the dry mouth) 2. Tissues (too many uses, it is very considerate to take out a pack of tissues at the right time) 3. Chewing gum (You never know what will happen next) 4. Condom (I would rather let the condom be placed in the bag as a label of sexual blessing 10,000 times, and don’t once rush out of the hotel to find a convenience store)
40. For the first date men, please avoid wearing the following items: sports shoes (especially basketball shoes, training shoes); sandals or slippers of any style, if you wear socks in the sandals, the girls may leave directly; formal tie (If you are just getting off work, please take it off, fashion tie is used with caution, it will be too formal); shorts or cropped trousers (excessive casual); baseball cap; too conspicuous jewelry (big gold chain or something alike)
41. First appointment women treat the following elements carefully: sports shoes (high heels are the best, don’t tell me that you are too lazy to dress up for the first appointment); too many and too conspicuous jewelries (showing is one aspect, high maintenance is another); too Heavy makeup (cosmetic contact lenses, panda-like eye shadows, glamorous lipsticks, bright blinding lip gloss, etc. Natural nude makeup or light makeup is recommended); colorful clothes.
42. How is the first date considered successful? 1. You two changed from the uncertain to relaxation, strangers to feeling natural. 2. Feel that some topics have not been fully discussed, and there are still some opportunities to look forward to. 3. “Would you like to see each other again?” Say “Yes” without hesitation, no special reason is needed 4. The other party is not perfect, but there are some traits and attributes that are particularly noticeable. 5. A second meeting has been arranged before the end of the first date.
43. How does the first date considered a failure? 1. I don’t feel that the other party has any noteworthy aspects 2. Each other listed various conditions and background information, but there is no attractive aspect 3. The other party repeatedly says something and does something like an obsessive-compulsive disorder that makes you feel disgusted 4. The way of thinking and expression is different. 5. If you imagine that you already have a partner, but you are not interested in being friends with this person at all, then don’t continue.
44. The first date is actually very light in the overall relationship development because it has little effect on a long-term relationship. Some people may object, thinking that the first date may directly kill the two people’s relationship. Such an first date is not bad. In fact, it is reminding both parties that there are too many people who do not match and do not call. It will be very difficult to continue to force them.
45. Although the initial appointment is relatively unimportant, it does not mean you can do whatever you want. People who take first dates seriously often take their feelings seriously. This is also the 45 suggestions’ purpose of helping everyone in every detail because the details determine success or failure. First dates have little impact on family and career success, but those who fail from the beginning will hardly have good results. Good luck, everyone!