A few days ago, there was a hot topic about “Your worst dating experience”.
A group of female netizens seemed to have found an outlet, and started a crazy complaint mode.
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“I was starving, but he took me 50 miles away to eat at a restaurant he likes very much.”
“I put on a lovely dress but he took me to go fishing.”
“We chatted very well texting, but he was very shy in person on the first date, and the whole dating was extremely embarrassing.”
“I spent two hours putting on makeup try to leave him a good impression, but he took me swimming.”
I feel very sorry for the girls and sorry for the guys trying so hard to impress his date. Obviously, it was an excellent opportunity to get closer, but in the end, he did some things worse and pushed the girl away.
Why is this so?
No 1. Arrangement without asking for an opinion
Many boys tend to be more or less machismo when dealing with feelings. They arrange everything for girls and want to create a responsible and considerate image of a reliable man. When dating, he plans about all the itineraries, including where to go, what to do, and what to eat.
Little do they know that they can go wrong sometimes.
I once told a story: I wanted to eat a pear, and you gave me a box of apples. I said I don’t like it, and then you spent all your money and gave me a cart of oranges. I rejected you; you don’t understand, “I have used up all my money and gave you all of me; why do you still not accept me!?”
However, I only wanted a pear from the beginning.
This is the consequence of not understanding the girls’ thoughts.
Dating is a matter of two people. Unless you know for sure, if you want her to enjoy it, prepare some ideas and ask her opinion.
If you want to throw surprises, give her somewhat a heads up. “Don’t wear sandals,” “Don’t wear makeup,” if you are planning to go far, prepare some snacks so you won’t starve her.
No. 2 Showing off too much
When dating, in order to make a good impression on girls, guys sometimes exert themselves too hard and overexpress themselves.
They then turn out too pretending.
Things you don’t have, something you haven’t experienced, experiences you haven’t felt, places you haven’t been. You want girls to think that you have them. If you’re trying to get a sense of admiration, you will try to pretend to be as perfect as you can; it will appear particularly fake.
This is the most common phenomenon: the more you want to do something well in front of this her, the less you can do it. It will make you nervous and unable to communicate with the girl normally, so it usually only has a counterproductive effect.
Right direction: Don’t express yourself deliberately, keep your own style, keep your own frame, and let girls get along with you gradually.
No 3. A avoid physical contacts
On the first date, avoid physical contacts. Even if it’s a pat on her head, few girls can accept it. What’s more, if you touch other places, expect to get the F word back.
Physical contact with girls will increase the intimacy between you, but touching behavior is the most difficult and most important step in the escalation of the relationship. A little carelessness will change from ambiguous to indecent, and it will be in the minds of girls from now on The image plummeted.
The premise of physical touching is that you and your date have established trust and comfort. On this basis, some of your intimate actions will create an ambiguous atmosphere rather than disgusting her.
In fact, to put it simply, you have to consider where your relationship has progressed and the acceptance of girls’ intimate behaviors at the moment.
Dating is supposed to be romantic and beautiful. The ultimate goal is to upgrade your relationship. Two people slowly approach with an ambiguous atmosphere, from strangers to familiar, from friends to lovers. With a successful date, there will be another new couple instead of two acquaintance people.
The reality is that after dating a girl, many boys have a pretty good relationship that has taken a turn for the worse. Some girls even made it clear that it was inappropriate and there is no need to see him again.