No matter what you call yourself—toy boy, cougar, sugar daddy, or playmate—you’re not alone. Relationships between people of different generations are all the rage!
Age differences in relationships used to be a very taboo subject. Of course, this depends on the culture, but in general, a big age difference between a couple has always been seen with some suspicion, as if it wasn’t quite right.
Well, luckily, people’s views seem to have changed now that they have more access to digital media. This has made us more aware of these things and made them more acceptable. There will always be prejudice against people who are different, but it is getting less and less common.
Let’s tell the truth. We just talked about the prejudices that are often held against people in intergenerational relationships. These prejudices are very different depending on whether you are the older or younger person in the relationship and whether you are a man or a woman. In the next section, we’ll look at the four main types of people who might be in such a relationship, their possible reasons for doing so, and the bad feelings they might have about it.
#1: The toy boy.
A young man in a relationship who is usually in his 20s or close to it. He is active and good-looking, which makes him the perfect arm candy for an older woman who can take care of all his boyish needs and jokes. The public, on the other hand, might see the toy boy as immature, needy, and not very manly. This is because the toy boy usually chooses a relationship where he is not expected to provide.
#2: The other player.
This time, it’s a young girl with a background very similar to that of the toy boy. She seems happy to trade her time for the attention and care that older, more successful men give her. She is a trophy for the older man to show off in public, just like a Bentley or Rolex. She is usually as pretty as a picture and has a killer body to match.
The most common stereotypes about the play mate are that she is stupid and doesn’t have any common sense. However, she is generally more accepted than the toy boy because she fits better with the traditional expectations of a woman’s role.
#3: A cougar.
A cougar is usually a middle-aged woman, usually between her early thirties and early fifties, who likes to hang out with much younger men. This is a term that didn’t exist that long ago but is now all too common.
In the public’s mind, a cougar’s preferences seem to be linked only to a need for sex. They may be single, married, divorced, or something else, but they usually treat the younger person they like their own child.
#4 The sugar daddy.
The older man, who could be anywhere from his early forties to his deathbed, always seems to have a young, pretty, and very open-minded playmate on his arm. He might want to do it for sexual reasons, because being around younger people makes him feel motivated and energized, or just because he wants to win a trophy.
Since the sugar daddy has been around since the beginning of time, there is less prejudice against him than there is jealousy. However, some people find this habit a little bit creepy and think it’s a little bit insulting to modern women.
Pros of the difference
Really, the only bad things about a relationship between two people with a big age difference are the stereotypes that people make about them and the sometimes rude or insulting opinions that come from those stereotypes. All that should really matter is if two people are attracted to each other, in love, and have so much in common that a relationship seems inevitable. But there are a lot of good reasons for the age difference to work, and some of them are in the next two sections.
The good things about seeing an older person
#1 Better sex.
Forget the idea that older people aren’t as good as they used to be. In bed, they are so much better. No fumbling around under the bed sheets like a fool, because they’ve done this before and know their way around a naked body.
Get ready to do things you’ve never even thought of and to have orgasms that will change the way you think about them. Have a sexual fantasy that younger partners have always been afraid to try? Now is the time to tell everyone everything and enjoy the attention that comes with it.
#2 Better conversation.
Are you sick of hearing about football games or teen boy bands and want to learn something new? With years of social, leisure, and work experience behind them, you are much more likely to get a better level of conversation than the usual air-headed guff that is common among your peers.
#3 Growing up.
Not the kind you can see, but the kind you feel. If you want to get ahead in life and start making plans to do so, an older partner will give you all the help you could ever need. They are also more likely to have their own lives in order and to be able to help you deal with the drama that often comes with being young.
#4. The children.
Not an obvious one, but many younger halves of a couple are happy to join a family that is already set up and be a part of the loving and committed environment that can come with that. Grimm’s fairy tales don’t have to have all stepmothers and stepfathers.
The pros of going out with someone younger
#1: More exciting sex.
The younger partner does definitely bring a lot more energy into the bedroom. They might not have as much skill or finesse, but that can be taught quickly. The difference in energy is especially noticeable between younger men and older women. Men’s sexual energy peaks between the ages of 18 and 20, while women’s sexual energy peaks in their mid- to late-30s. Women tend to look for affairs when they are in their mid- to late-30s because of this.
Even though it might make the older person in the couple seem like they are trying to control the younger person, there is a lot to be said for having a young mind and body that you can shape the way you want. Most of the time, this will be good anyway, since the younger half wants to learn from someone who becomes both their lover and their role model.
#3 New references to other cultures.
When your friends and family are all around the same age and you find yourself stuck in a different decade, it’s easy to feel cut off from the modern world. There is no way to stay up to date on what’s happening in the world than to have a human news feed next to you in bed. Be ready to shock your older friends with your up-to-date knowledge of youth and pop culture. This will make them feel like old fogies.
#4 No kids.
Chances are, you’ve done all you can for your family and now want to spend the rest of your life getting to know yourself again and having fun. Finding a partner who is a lot younger than you is more likely to free you from family problems and give you a friend whose main goal in life is to have fun.
So, forget the old ideas about dating someone from a different generation. Who cares about age if you’re in a relationship for the right reasons?
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