Dating Anxiety: Embrace Your Fear and Return to the Dating Scene
Dating can be stressful, but it shouldn’t get in the way of your overall pleasure. Learn how to overcome your fear of dating and get back into the game.
Dating can be stressful for someone who has been single for a long period of time. It’s excruciating. You want nothing more than to meet new people and find love, but dating anxiety prevents you from doing so. When it comes to dating, you may wonder if it is feasible to overcome your fear.
That’s why you cancel dates, you don’t meet anyone, and you’re afraid to take risks that could lead to happiness.
I’ve been plagued by this anxiousness for a long time. I spent four years on and off dating apps before meeting anyone due to my fear of meeting new people.
Furthermore, dating anxiety is based on a faulty logic. Although we’re apprehensive about starting a new relationship, the factors that keep us from doing so are actually rather ridiculous.
What are dating jitters?
There are a plethora of symptoms and underlying causes that go into dating anxiety.
It’s understandable to be concerned about getting catfished or kidnapped if you meet someone online. There’s also the fear of being humiliated or turned down.
Then there’s the irrational fear that has no rational explanation. You’ll be able to overcome the jitters of a first date. When your worries grow into chronic anxiety that causes you to cancel plans on a regular basis, you may be in need of some treatment.
It doesn’t matter whether you suffer from social anxiety or just get nervous about going on dates; we all do. We go on a date with preconceived notions about how it will go. Then there’s the irrational fear, which is even worse.
What can you do to overcome your fear of dating?
It will take time to learn how to overcome dating anxiety. Recalibrating your perspective on dating requires effort and patience. Rethinking how dating works takes time, regardless of whether you’re afraid of being wounded, rejected, or just falling flat on your face on a first date.
Some things you may do to make the move to a new way of looking at dates will help ease the transfer process.
Don’t get caught up.
In the aftermath of being ghosted endlessly, I sank into a deep depression for years. I succumbed to the pressure and uncertainty of the situation. The fact that it was so inconvenient that I couldn’t even date was something I talked about nonstop. Even if someone you don’t know very well ghosts or rejects you, it’s not the end of the world. What that individual is saying about them says more about them than it does about you. Remaining in a state of anxiety-inducing desperation is counterproductive.
Make the most of it.
We can’t enjoy ourselves on dates because of our fear of rejection and awkwardness. Regardless of whether or not it’s working, have fun with it. Nowadays, meeting new people can feel more like a chore or a cruel joke than a pleasurable social engagement. Dating may be fun if you accept it for what it is. The data fails when you have expectations. Dates rarely go as planned, no matter how optimistic you are about the situation. Every date can be more enjoyable if you don’t worry about what to wear or what to say.
Don’t overthink things.
Anxiety is caused by overthinking, and overthinking is caused by stress. Even if you have a natural ability to plan and look at every scenario from every viewpoint, overthinking does not help. Prior to the date, keep yourself occupied with other activities. To keep your anxiety at bay, keep your thoughts occupied with something beneficial.
Don’t be afraid to be yourself.
This was the most challenging element of the process for me. It was tough for me to remain open to new options as someone who had so much dating anxiety and had a clear objective in mind. I was not content with a mediocre job or life. In my mind, I knew that dating was the beginning of a long-term relationship. The thought of a date with someone who wasn’t clear on what they wanted made me nervous. What’s the point of dating someone if our aspirations are so different? If you’re willing to consider different options, you might come to understand that what you originally thought you wanted isn’t what you really need.
Set your standards high and refuse to be satisfied with anything less.
As an example, if you’re looking for a long-term relationship, but meet someone who is just interested in casual flings, it’s unlikely to work out. For those who are open to it, though, it could be the best thing for your relationship.
You can overcome your dating jitters with time, patience, and a little bit of careful thought.