He’s Not Just Into You: 9 Lessons
Because we don’t like the results, many of us refuse to accept things, especially when it comes to relationships. What we can’t have always appeals to us. Unfortunately, when it comes to our own personal relationships, we often fail to believe the “voice of reason” and the indicators that are constantly right in front of us. Or, perhaps, we’ve simply chosen not to notice them. Accept them or not. A combination of the two is likely.
Consequently, we disregard all of the indicators, even if they are signs so large that they are virtually waving in our faces, Then, where do we go from here? First comes denial, next comes acceptance of truth for what it is, and last comes closure.
1. You are more than capable. When you’re in a healthy, good, real relationship, you don’t have to feel tired all the time or guilty for being who you are. You have what it takes. All that matters is that you are good enough. Your relationship is unhealthy and detrimental to your well-being if it doesn’t make you happy.
2. A lifetime shouldn’t last forever. In a relationship guidebook or a love bible, getting engaged and living happily ever after with your partner doesn’t have a predetermined time range. A person can easily discern whether or not they really want to spend the rest of their life with someone by using common sense.
If you’ve been dating for more than five years, you should know if you want to spend the rest of your life with the person you’re with. That means you shouldn’t waste any more of that precious time with someone who can’t seem to make up his mind about you being the one.
Your relationship and your emotions would not be on a see-saw if you were dating someone who actually cared about you and wanted to spend the rest of your life together with you.
3. You’re not in a race against anyone. However, dating shouldn’t ever be seen as a competition. Avoid the urge to compete with another woman, even if you’re trying to get the attention of a guy and recognize that he may be interested in someone else. Take it as a cue to leave if he shows signs that he’s interested in someone else or that he’s not that into you.
4. Overthinking is a waste of time. It’s so usual for us to invent absurd justifications for things that should be so obvious. Having a guy not call you back, and you believing his phone was stolen or he was in difficulty, when in fact, he’s just not interested is the most prevalent situation. Everybody has done it. Accepting that we have been rejected is something we cannot bear to face.
5. Keep your bearings, please. It’s impossible to know why certain people cheat. People cheat for a variety of reasons, but accessibility and ego are two of the most common. People cheat on their partners not because they want to or because they feel unappreciated at home, but because they have the ability to do so. Because they are self-centered, they give in and have weak moments.
In a healthy and mature relationship, it doesn’t matter if the world’s most beautiful woman were standing right in front of you. You and your partner would never cheat on each other. In love, no force on the planet can make you commit adultery.
6. No one has ever said sex is difficult. A chore is anything that needs to be done around the house, such as washing the dishes, folding the laundry, making the bed, or cleaning the bathroom. However, sex with your spouse should never feel like a chore. If you’re in a relationship with someone you truly care about, sex shouldn’t feel like an obligation. It should have the effect of strengthening the bond between the two people participating in it.
7. In the event that he likes you, he’ll remember your name. In the film, Drew Barrymore’s character falls in love with a musician who then records a love song for her and leaves it as a voicemail. His voicemail serenades her, but she discovers that he left another one after she hears it. In the voicemail, he sings the exact same song, but with the other girl’s name in the lyrics, as if to indicate that it was meant for her.
In other words, if a guy really likes you, he won’t sing you the same song he sings to all of his other females. In addition to that, he won’t have any other women in his life. Your phone number and name will never be mistaken for anybody else’s by him if you let him have you. Period.
8. Love isn’t always a sham. When we play the dating game too much, we may end up playing with someone who is actually looking for real, lasting love. There is a constant sense that we must keep our emotional defenses up at all times because of the things we witness in the media and in real life.
Our hearts may close off to those who aren’t interested in participating in the game. And you may realize that this person is the one who can truly make you happy if you trust them and allow yourself to think that not everyone is out to hurt you.
9. Errors are to be expected. A lot of time and effort are required to find the perfect match for you. Mistakes teach us valuable lessons that can be applied in the future. There’s no substitute for experience, but it can also be brutal.
Until they get tired of us and move away, we don’t even recognize that a great guy or girl is standing right in front of us. If you’re dating a jerk, you may not know it at first, until that one moment when you finally come to terms with it. Our one shot at true love can be squandered if we continuously shoving someone away.
Our dating and romantic fantasies are often based on unrealistic expectations. We want to be noticed, but we don’t want to feel like we have to. For us, the most important thing is to feel loved and cared for. Commitment without responsibility is what we’re looking for. It is our desire to have security without having to safeguard any of it. Transparency is important, but so is the ability to keep our own personal information private.
In contrast, when you’re in a relationship that brings you both joy and fulfillment, you stop caring about anything else and focus solely on the other person. It’s easy to lose sight of the possible drawbacks of a situation when you’re with someone for the right reasons.
In the painfully realistic and entertainingly hilarious experiences of numerous couples, “He’s Just Not That Into You” has taught me a lot. If you’ve been in the dating scene for any length of time, you’ll notice that these scenarios are all too real.