Exactly what does “pity sex” entail? Inappropriate sexual behavior! Let’s look at some telltale symptoms to see whether you’ve ever engaged in pity sex.
Sometimes, sex can be a murky topic. The process itself isn’t hard, but dealing with the feelings attached to it often is. Having experienced pity sex is something most people would know if they had done, although it’s conceivable you didn’t realize what it was at the time. You can determine if this is the case for you by learning the characteristics of pity sex.
Despite this, it happens frequently enough that the question of whether or not it’s a positive thing deserves discussion.
There are many points of view. It might be perceived as a generous gesture on the one hand, and as cruel and evil on the other. But you’ll need to know what pity sex is in order to make that call for yourself, and even to determine if you’ve ever engaged in it.
So, describe pity sex for me.
Compassionate sex is when two people come together because they feel sorry for each other. The inverse is also true. Someone might want to help you feel better by having sex with you out of pity.
Now do you see the problem? There are two possible types of pity sex that you may or may not have been aware of at the time. As a result of feeling sorry for them, it would have been easy to have sex in both situations.
When you have sex in this fashion, the other person may have the impression that more is going on than meets the eye. Someone might interpret this as a sign of genuine interest in them and the beginning of a lovely relationship with you. But you just slept with them because you were desperate for it, and you felt bad for them. That won’t exactly boost their self-assurance, will it?
How to tell whether you’ve ever experienced pity sex.
There are a few ways you might have encountered pity sex, as we discussed above. You, too could have found yourself on either end of the sympathy spectrum. If you have indulged in any of these, the indications will tell you exactly which one.
1. Following a significant emotional setback, you made love to another person.
It’s probably pity sex if you and another person had sexual relations shortly after you both had to deal with a very stressful or upsetting circumstance. The likelihood is high that they were aware of it, felt awful about it, and wanted to help you feel better. They wouldn’t want to have sex with a crying person, thus it was probably pity sex. They only did it to cheer you up.
2. After a breakdown or a quarrel, you two had sex.
Pity sex can occur even during makeup sex. When one has an emotional breakdown or a quarrel with their partner and then immediately engages in sex, it is not regular sex. Maybe they did it out of pity.
3. Someone you had sex with has now dumped you.
No, it’s not breakup sex if you and your ex wind up having sexual relations after breaking up. Probably some sort of “pity sex” going on here. They’ll do you again since they feel terrible for destroying your heart the first time.
4. You were receiving comfort when the sexual activity began.
It’s pity sex if you had it to feel better or after someone cheered you up, and it doesn’t matter what the reason was for needing comforting.
5. The other individual initially declined, but your anger made them change their mind.
Since most of us have a hard time admitting when someone else is unwilling to do anything, this may be a bit more difficult to recognize. It’s called “sad sex” when you pursue a sexual activity with someone who first shows little interest. As expected, they stayed firm in their decision. They were sorry to have to turn you down.
6. You intended to improve someone’s mood.
Pity sex refers to sexual activity with the sole intention of alleviating the emotional distress of the recipient. Now you’re sad. That’s the whole point—to make them happy. It’s not typical to engage in sexual activity for the sole purpose of gratification. Pity sex is when one person feels sorry for another and then gives them a bang.
7. Getting it done with was all you cared about.
There is a high incidence of this in marriages that are not in good health. Your partner is eager to engage in some sexually suggestive behavior, but you aren’t in the mood. But you don’t want to make them furious, so you do it anyhow. It’s a pity sex if they want it and you’re not really present and interested.
Pity sex is something you might not have tried before. If yes, you were either experiencing or expressing sympathy. To determine which one, look for these indicators.