The relationship has ended but you’re still holding on. It takes time to settle the emotional roller coaster and realize the relationship is over.
Relationships, like anything worth doing, have their ups and downs, no matter how wonderful they appear to be. We’ve all been experienced difficult times with the people we care about and having a few fights here and there is normal in a healthy relationship. You may, however, be confronted with a sense of doubt that is difficult to shake. Your faith in the other person has been eroded by a tough occurrence. As a result, how do you tell if the relationship is over or not? Look at your relationship with your partner in a new light.
Analyzing both the positive and negative aspects of your relationship will help you choose whether or not it’s time to part ways. When you still care about each other, it may not be in your best interest to stay together.
Long-term emotional commitment makes it simpler to ignore differences of opinion (even if they happen more often than they used to). Considering ending a relationship with someone you care about is never an easy decision. It’s not always easy, but you can learn to recognize when a relationship is over and prepare yourself for the aftermath.
6 Signs your relationship is over:
Look out for these six telltale signals that a relationship is over if you’re not sure what to do.
1. No Emotional Effect is felt.
It’s difficult to judge if a relationship is worth saving if the flame has gone out. If you’re no longer vulnerable and open with your lover, it’s a sure sign that your relationship is over and will come to an end. Positive, long-term relationships are built on the foundation of mutual trust and open communication between the two people involved.
Deeper feelings are “hidden from ourselves and others… When we’re acting in ways that aren’t typical of us, we might need to conduct some introspection to figure out what’s driving our behavior,” Suzanne Degges-White, Ph.D., a professional counselor, says.
A lack of openness could be an indication that you no longer desire a long-term relationship. Similar to this, if you’ve seen a decrease in your relationship’s enjoyable banter—or the inability to hold an interesting conversation—your bond may be weakening.
2. You’ve lost interest in physical intimacy.
During the course of a relationship, sexual desire might fluctuate. Getting your sex life back on track after a slowdown is not always an indication that the relationship is over. Think about the first time you were intimate with your spouse and how the memories make you feel, according to Degges-White. There is a chance that you are still attracted to your partner if you can get back to that place in your thoughts and appreciate where it leads you.
The opposite is true if your love for your spouse has dwindled to the point that you’re no longer interested in him or her at all. It is common for a lack of sexual attraction to indicate the health and viability of a relationship. It could be a sign of a relationship that needs work or that a split is imminent if the mere thought of your lover being close to you or touching you intimately makes you uncomfortable.
Sex can be the first of many ties to disappear in some relationships that are on the approach of breaking up.
3. Is there a possibility to agree on a single point?
Another clue that you’re headed for a split is that you and your partner no longer see eye-to-eye. When you’re constantly at odds, it’s easy for tempers to flare up on both sides.
Andrea Bonior, Ph.D., a licensed clinical psychologist, advises people to “take it seriously” when the fighting is so intense that there are only a few moments of calm.
Although it may sound odd, not arguing enough may be a bad sign. Some couples get so fed up with fighting that they decide to break up with each other.
They typically cease communicating with one another and are unable to bring up any form of argument amongst themselves or with anyone else. When the only thing you and your partner can agree on is that you can’t agree on anything, it’s a bad sign for the future of your union.
4. You Think Someone Else Is More Attractive.
Even though fantasizing about other people is perfectly acceptable, it can be damaging if it diminishes the value of intimate encounters with your relationship. Even if you’re obsessing over a former flame, a coworker, or a stranger, it’s important to reassess your sentiments.
According to Degges-White, “you’re probably crossing a boundary that you shouldn’t” when your dreams are taking time and energy away from time spent with your partner.
There’s nothing wrong with having sexual thoughts about other people as long as they enhance your relationship. But if your spouse’s role is diminishing as a result of these fantasies, it’s time to find another partner or start a talk. It’s time to have a conversation if your partner is no longer your number one priority in bed.
5. There’s No More Faith.
Trust is difficult to reestablish, regardless of whether or not your partner has an affair. Any real connection is stymied if you don’t have confidence in the person you’re relying on for support. Relationships that are built on distrust crumble from the inside out, according to Bonior. It’s not enough to simply focus on regaining trust; you must also address the root of the issues that caused it in the first place.
6. Your Purposes Aren’t in Consonance.
When two people in a relationship want different things, it can be difficult to accept. With no matter how much you care for each other, if you don’t have the same long-term goals, it’s impossible to re-align your ambitions and dreams. It’s not uncommon to see “amazing love” in a relationship “stymied by aspirations that are utterly different,” Bonior explains.
Couples often battle with their objectives, whether it’s having children, pursuing a career, or deciding where to live. Her conclusion: “The warning flags are hard to ignore without compromise, but there is hope with that.”
If you find yourself where you and your partner aren’t on the same page, it’s never pleasant. Even if you’re no longer in love, it’s possible that you and your partner could benefit from therapy to improve your ability to communicate and understand one another. All relationships face challenges, so if you’re confident that your partner is “the one,” look for innovative approaches to resolving disagreements that are beneficial to both of you.
Relationships are difficult to keep because it takes a lot of patience, hard work and determination to stick it out till the end. However, there are signs that your relationship is headed for a dead-end.