Do you ever find yourself wondering how to maintain eye contact without coming off as creepy? Apply these tips and guidelines in making eye contact to prevent an awkward stare-down.
Making eye contact has always been one of those social skills you need to master because it feels so unnatural at first.
Say you spot a potential romantic interest and want to get their attention.
We can only assume that making eye contact is the first and most important step. That’s what everyone keeps telling us. They will be confused as to whether or not you are gazing at them and, if so, why. Because of this, if you feel awkward and retreat, people may mistake your hesitation for disinterest. No one makes a romantic overture. Right now, everyone has to start over from scratch.
The other result is that you appear odd since you can’t seem to master the art of making eye contact. I won’t bother explaining myself. You gaze instead of giving a flirtatious glance and smiling slowly. The only action required is a blank stare. This is a very uncomfortable situation. The longer it continues, the more uncomfortable it will eventually be.
You must be feeling some sort of discomfort at this very now.
Ability that is rarely taught in school
You’ve probably been here before! Making appropriate eye contact is a skill that is rarely taught in school. Everyone treats it as though it were a given that we should comply with the recommendation. It isn’t. There’s a proper way to do it, and then there’s the completely incorrect way.
Learn how to create eye contact without being creepy if you want to impress your crush or other people you meet for the first time.
These 7 easy steps will teach you how to make eye contact.
There is an art to making eye contact that is unforced and comfortable for the other person. Then, keep staring at them as you talk. Assist them in feeling like they have your undivided attention by listening to them.
1. Increase your eye contact gradually.
Don’t stare intently or for too long. The threshold to strange territory is low here. Instead, it’s better to start small and gradually increase the pace. A fleeting peek at the apple of your eye followed by averting your gaze.
Give it a few minutes, then try again, keeping your eyes peeled for a few seconds longer. They will soon realize that you are attempting to gain their attention.
2. Make direct eye contact with them.
I get how uncomfortable it might be to stare someone in the eyes. The discomfort may make you want to glance away fast, but it’s preferable to stare at their nose or forehead.
They’ll probably think you’re staring at a fresh pimple on their face or are incredulous at the size of their nose. Look off to the side of their faces if the intensity is too intense. That way, they won’t know anything about it. And, as a bonus, you won’t feel quite so uncomfortable.
3. Hold this gaze for at least four seconds.
How long should you keep eye contact after establishing that you have the other person’s attention? If you’re just learning to make eye contact, experts recommend looking at someone for no more than five seconds at a time.
I’ll explain how to achieve that in a moment, but please know that anything more than five seconds is highly unsettling. When you’re acutely aware of the passage of time, even five seconds can feel like an eon.
4. Withdraw your gaze carefully.
Don’t immediately avert your gaze or act like you’ve been caught breaking a rule. Instead, turn your gaze slowly away, perhaps with a sly grin on your face. It communicates your intentions to the other person. Making an effort to make eye contact might assist the other person read your mind and knowing what you mean even before you say a word.
Having them feel like they have your undivided attention is also crucial. You could come out timid or terrified if you cut your gaze off too abruptly. Not the style we’re going for at all!
5. Make a move to break the ice.
It’s not a good idea to stare at someone for an extended period of time. You don’t want them to assume that you’ve grown tired of them. In that instance, you should make a gesture before you turn away. Besides the coy smile I stated, there are other methods to accomplish this, such as a head beckoning (come here and talk to me), a wink, a cheeky grin, or a shrug to imply “I’m trying here, and I’m not great at it!”
6. Practice the art of knowing how long to look someone in the eye while chatting with them.
Change the frequency and duration of your eye contact when conversing with this person. It’s weird if you keep staring at them the whole time you talk to them. Put simply, don’t do that.
During a conversation, it is recommended that you make and maintain eye contact at least 50% of the time. You avoid my gaze for the remaining period. However, when listening to another person, make an effort to keep eye contact with them for a somewhat longer period of time. If so, then roughly 75% of the time will suffice.
7. Be sure to use your eyelids!
Have you ever been the subject of someone’s unblinking gaze during a conversation or a request for your attention? They believe it works, but it truly scares me. Because of this, it’s important to practice blinking while learning to make eye contact. It eliminates any eeriness and makes everything feel more natural.
Think about the message your body language might be sending. Even if you look someone in the eye, a grimace betraying your discomfort will make your message less clear. Try to chill out and keep a friendly grin on your face.
Making eye contact is a skill that is not instinctive for everyone to pick up. The eyes, as the old adage goes, are the “windows to the soul.” Because of this, making prolonged eye contact with another person might be uncomfortable. The level of difficulty is just too high.
You won’t be staring at them for too long, just enough to let them know you’re interested in talking to them. Nothing will scare off the individual you’re trying to get to know better than more than a few glances accompanied by a smile. Otherwise, you wouldn’t have gained anything from your efforts.
Don’t rush through the process of mastering eye contact. Listen to your instincts and do what puts you at peace. Remember the advice to keep cool and avoid making your potential partner uncomfortable.
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